You instinctively know when you are in the right, some call it conceit, others inspiration, it's up to you who you believe. Stick to your guns, but make sure you use a reliable solvent that won't cause a rash.

Keep scuba diving to a minimum at work, unless you're a scuba diver. Aqualungs may interfere with that promotion you were hoping for, and smelling of seaweed could attract unwanted kittens to your workstation.

Problems at work will seem to evaporate today, but that's only because they've finally put the central heating on, you'll probably be fired later in the week. Don't forget to buy more jam.

The sun is in your ascendant this week, so be sure to call a plumber. Avoid crustaceans wherever possible and continue to smile at Mary, she thinks you're a little mad, but that's no bad thing.

As the planets sweep through their fourth trimester, waves of confusion and contradiction can cloud your metaphors. Be sure to leave work early today and don't forget to pick up your dry cleaning.

Remember there are two sides to every story, so when conflict enters your life, be sure to stand near tall trees quacking like a duck. It confuses the heck out of your adversaries.

Being cautious is all very well, but if you're too wary you may miss golden opportunities. Be brave and walk the extra mile this month, you may be rewarded for your bravery, and if not, then think of what you'll save on bus fares.

Love sails across your horizon today, so make sure your fire is well stoked and write HELP in really big letters in the sand. If you're not currently marooned on a dessert island then keep the fire lighting to a minimum.

The thing you have most been looking for is within your grasp. Don't worry about the breakfast cereal any longer than necessary, it will release the object of your desire all in good time. Don't forget to give Colin his pants back, he may need them in the weeks to come.

What an amazing time you're having at the moment, things don't get much better than this. Love, money, happiness all seem to be in abundance. If they're not, then there may be an error on your birth certificate.

The biscuit of hope has crumbled on the plate of destiny, so you'll need to carry and industrial vacuum cleaner with you at all times this month. Make sure you have enough extension lead and a strong pair of trousers.

Joy is your middle name this month, unless it isn't, in which case you may want to consider changing it by deed pole. Everyone seems to love you and even small rodents chortle as you walk by.